Today is just one of the lazy day where I curled up in my room and did nothing productive.
I was feeling hungry, so I went to the kitchen and cook myself some food. Took out frozen nuggets and fries from the fridge, deep fried em and lunch here I go.
Suddenly I came into reminiscing my childhood days. Back then, one of the happiest moment I've ever felt is whenever mom cook fries for us in the evening. I remember how mom would buy lotsa fries for us everytime we went for monthly grocery shopping, and I would eagerly wait for mom to bring em out of fridge for us to eat. Sometimes it took a week, but sometimes it took mom a month to cook the fries, simply because mom forgot bout it hahaha.
But I remember how happy my brothers and I when mom called us "Jom makan kentang, mama dah goreng banyak ni." We would hurriedly run to the living room and try to snatch the fries from each other, as greedy as we are.
It was a memorable childhood moment. Just sitting there in front of the tv, eating fries together as a family and try my best to eat as much as I can before my two fat brothers took em all.
That simple, yet significant happiness.
I miss my family so much. With my mom's recent condition, I often can't sit still. I keep on imagining stuffs; what if something happened to her and I can't be there? What if the time left for me to have her in my life was getting lesser without me realizing it? What if I would never able to see her again?
I don't know. It hurts so much but I tell no one bout this.
My deepest fear, my greatest sadness.
I wish I would never have to know how does it feels to lose my mother.
Two more years, ma.
Two more years and I'll be home.
Wait for me to come home.